Wednesday, October 27, 2021

Dyscalculia: locked out of math


October is Learning Disabilities Awareness Month. Learning disabilities are disorders of the brain that affect the ability of a normally intelligent child to learn in spite of having the resources and conditions to do so. But what does it actually mean to live with a learning disability? This is the story of Riyaz and Mithu. 

It's exam time. 9-year-old Riyaz and father are studying. Question1: There are 250 students in the school. 115 are boys. How many girls are there in the school? Riyaz, bright eyes shining, ventures, ‘Addition?’ Riyaz tries again, ‘Is it multiplication?’ ‘Subtraction?’ He gets it right, eventually. But wait a minute, did he just guess it? Yes, he did. Riyaz still has to use his fingers to count while doing simple sums. At the shop he argues with the shopkeeper for change; everyone else is getting some money back, so why shouldn’t he? Then there is Mithu, who is 23 years old. She is the ‘absent-minded professor’. Mithu is always late. She loses her way constantly. She has to secretly clench the fist of her ‘writing’ hand to tell right from left. She does not remember birthdays, phone numbers or her bank balance. Riyaz and Mithu have Dyscalculia.  Numbers are a mystery to them. 


Numbers are everywhere. In salaries and calories, BMIs and EMIs, in aggregates and averages. Most of us, even those who never liked maths, swim through this sea of numbers effortlessly. Not dyscalculics. Dyscalculia is a well-established Specific Learning Disorder (SLD) and about 6% of school-age children might be affected. But it doesn’t get diagnosed that easily, after all many of us find maths tough. Even many teachers and special educators are unfamiliar with the condition. But a certified clinical psychologist can diagnose dyscalculia by running a number of standardized tests.

Math skills are in fact a combination of different skills. Math requires imagination, visualization and abstraction. Then there are the symbols, for instance the symbol ‘3’ for three of any kind. None of this comes naturally to Riyaz and Mithu. But dyscalculia is more than just difficulty with math. There may be problems with working memory making it hard to keep track of multiple instructions such as those in a cooking video. Often there are spatial and visual orientation deficits like those that Mithu has; she has a tough time imagining different perspectives or following directions. Riyaz on the other hand, is not good at seeing patterns and grouping things based on shape and size. 

Many times, dyscalculia comes with other learning disorders such as dyslexia or dysgraphia. Dyscalculia runs in families; often one diagnosis of dyscalculia leads to revelations across the family.  Brain scans of people taken while they were solving simple arithmetic problems show that dyscalculics use different regions of the brain to process math problems compared to neurotypical people. The connectivity between different regions of the brain may also be different in dyscalculics. We still know very little about the neurobiology of dyscalculia. 


Mithu learned she had dyscalculia when she was 22; quite by accident, when she took the tests to help out a psychologist friend of hers. Suddenly her whole childhood made sense to her. She remembered the pitying looks she used to get from her teachers and family. All the times when she had to make excuses for turning up late to activities because she could never estimate time or distance. All the times she had felt stupid and dumb. But thanks to his father, Riyaz got diagnosed at 10. His parents and the school put together an Individualized Education Program (IEP) for him. The special educator worked with him using audio and visual teaching aids to explain the math concepts at his own pace. The school counsellor started working with him to address his math anxiety. He now gets extra time to complete his exam paper. He has the option to use calculators in the board exams. He can also choose the easier ‘basic’ level Math for the CBSE class X exams. Once he gains a basic working knowledge of functional math in the secondary school, that would be necessary for leading an independent life, he may even decide to drop math altogether in the IX class and substitute it with other subjects offered by CBSE. 


So, can dyscalculics live a successful and productive life without math? Why not? Mithu is studying to be a filmmaker. She has always been artistic, she sings and paints and writes poetry. She is a great storyteller and loves lending drama to her stories. She hopes to pull all these skills together to one day become India’s own Steven Spielberg, who incidentally, also grew up with learning disabilities. 

A modified version of this article was published in The Indian Express on 26th October 2021
Photo by Anne Nygård on Unsplash

Sunday, September 5, 2021

To be a mother...

Ten years ago, at this time, I was filled with anticipation mixed with trepidation. I was certain in my decision but was hazy about the consequences. In a few more hours we would set off, my parents and myself, a family of three. Of course I would be driving. But on our way back, I would not be driving. I would be otherwise occupied. And here I am, still otherwise occupied.


I set out in the morning as a single woman with not a care in the world, came back a mother. As my daughter cuddled in my arms in the backseat of the car, while my father drove and mother navigated, it had not really sunk in. I smiled down at the peacefully sleeping face, more in accordance with textbook behaviour. Then we reached home, parked our car and I climbed out with her in my arms. My neighbour who was coming down the stairs asked, ‘Whose child is this?’ and I replied, ‘Mine!’. That is when it hit me, I am a mother!


It is such an all-consuming, all subsuming identity. During these past ten years, I have wondered, that is when I get a few seconds of mental silence to do things like wonder. I have wondered, I used to be so many things before, but am I just a mother now? Can I ever be anything more anymore? But yesterday as I was imploring her to not let her talent for music go unrealized, emphasizing the importance of each of us making the most of our special abilities, she says, Amma, you should be a writer. I evade by saying I have nothing to write about and she quips, ‘You should write about your journey with me.’ So, here I am.


When I was interviewing for adoption they asked me the reason I wanted to adopt. I had thought deeply about it and I knew the answer: I wanted to have someone to give all the love I had inside me. I did not know then how giving love would become second nature, subconscious and all consuming. But then I had no clue that receiving love could be so nourishing and rejuvenating. For years, every evening it rejuvenated me when the bundle of energy hurtled at me as I stepped in through the front door. But like everything to do with a child, change is the only constant. I don’t get a hero’s welcome now. Days now are emotional, acrimonious and exhausting. Expectations are up there with the stars. But underneath the turmoil runs the cool waters of certainty that she’s got my back just as I have hers. That gives you the courage to reach for the said stars, even if you can’t reach them, you’ll certainly get a good stretch for your muscles! 


Image of Mother Godess from the Indus Valley Civilization by Chetana Sachidanandan


Friday, May 21, 2021

DO NOT

A comprehensive guide on 


How to achieve a state of purposelessness, rudderlessness and demotivation

How to become a stagnant marshland with no flow or will to go anywhere


Do not pick up any genetic mutations that will terminate you in utero

Do not be the product of a union between the old or illiterate or starving or diseased

Do not be the product of a union outside of wedlock

Do not be the product of a union with drugs or alcohol or violence or poverty

Do not be conceived in a society that rejects the female child; do not get aborted before birth; do not get suffocated, drowned, poisoned, thrown in garbage after birth

Do not be born to parents without enough affluence or influence to get pre-natal and ante-natal care 

Do not be born to a mother with no milk, no food, no safety, no medicines and no power to get any of these

Do not be born to a family with multiple mouths to feed and nothing to feed

Do not be born to a family with no power and no agency  

Do not be born to a caste that will denigrate your birth itself 

Do not be born to a tribe with no recourse to work or resources

Do not be born to a class where tomorrow is a wild unreasonable dream

Do not live in a caste, a class, a region or a society that cannot educate its young

Do not live in a family that has to prioritize education of some kids over others, males over females, younger over older, smarter over slower

Do not get sold, raped, beaten or starved to death before you see the threshold of a school

Do not go to a school where you are tortured or abused or only just wasting precious time

Do not go to a school where knowledge is a wonderous secret accessible only to the genius mind

Do not lose your parents to poverty, disease, disaster, abuse, self-harm or violence in childhood

Do not pick up an infection from the gutter, do not get bitten by a snake, do not fall into a well

Do not have your crops fail, or your loan recalled, your house washed away in the floods or your cattle die in the harvest

Do not let your family be driven away from home by climate or religion or caste 

Do not open your mouth against injustice, do not stand up against powerful forces

Do not get raped, burned by acid, shot, drowned, hung, set fire by in-laws

Do not be disabled, dependent or dead.


Photo by arsalan arianmehr on Unsplash

They don’t mind/ Don’t mind them

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